Equivocating

I was able to get up early today without much trouble... hurray for me!

I was pretty low-key today. I went to class of course, but I decided to let this be a 'me-day' and relaxed without stressing about work. However, I did get some library books for a paper... the last paper I'll write in my college career! I even spent some of the evening doing some free-reading (gasp) at Starbucks - the book was A Beautiful Mind... and no, I haven't seen the movie.

I'm sort of stressed about my family lately; I worry that I've let them down in some ways. Even though they don't exert pressure, I sometimes wish they would let me be and not talk too much about my future. It just gets me frustrated. I suppose I'm being immature about it, but I just get a little depressed when subject comes up.

In large part, it's because I'm so aimless, whereas the people who my mom might compare me to are really driven and have been certain about what they want to do. It frustrates me that you need to really dedicate yourself to a 'career track' so early in order to be 'successful'; in some ways it seems really limiting. But I guess one can say that the opposite extreme is just as bad. Part of my problem is that I'm not really a passionate person; I enjoy doing several things, but I can't do exclusively one thing at the expense of others or dedicate my life to a given career. Of course, wasting my time as a 'Jack of all trades' is more of a 'waste of my life' than any decent career would be.